Rambling About Friends

I really don't care whether or not you read this, so bleep off if you have opinions different than mine, and trust me, you do, so don't even get me started.
       Let's start with friends, shall we? Such a touchy subject for some people. Some people being me in specifics.The reason that it can be a touchy subject is because, well, the "friends" you've had aren't really "yours" to begin with and they sort of know it because you act weird when they're with other friends(which I was never able to accept before, but I'm trying now, because I would be a hypocrite to hate people who have other friends because I have other friends, too, you know, so)  and then try to "include" you, though it really doesn't make things any better. Okay, so I have this one friend(for the sake of privacy on the internet we'll call her Jane), and Jane is always hanging out with her friend Jill when she's not with me. It always puts me in an awkward position when I see Jane walking with Jill, since Jill's locker is three from mine, so Jane's pretty much always there. Jane and Jill made a lunch group, but it got to have too many people, so they split it up, breaking the original people away and leaving them to have regular lunch with the regular people. I was kind of mad, but Jane was more so than I(though she rarely gets mad). Then the lovely ol' counselor decided to reschedule our lunch group, and of course, Jane invited me in again, and now I'm in a lunch group with Jane, Jill, and another girl(we'll call her Lucy). I don't really mind having Lucy there, but Jill... It just kind of makes me feel out of place, and that she invited me into the lunch group on a guilt trip because she felt bad for not including me. I mean, fine. If Jane wants to include me, fine. But I don't exactly want to be included when it comes to Jill, because... I know that Jill has known Jane for longer than I have(a year longer, in fact), so I have no right to be getting all witchy on them, but Jill kind of weirds me out. Sure, she's nice enough, but it's like when she's there Jane's suddenly about her. Which could be the same issue with me when I'm with my other friend(once again for the sake of privacy, we'll give her a different name) Anna. Because when I'm with Jane and then Anna comes along, Anna and I start laughing about something that Jane doesn't know about, and it makes me feel bad, and I sort of try to include Jane, too, but... Anyway.
       Let's talk about wanna-be friends now. There's this girl(we'll call her Rosa), and Rosa thinks she's my "best friend". Well, that is until her real best friend, Mary, comes along, and then suddenly I don't exist. If Mary's there, I'm not, and if Mary's not, Rosa jumps all over me and showers me with all this stuff I really didn't care or need to know about. Like, she'd been giving me the "silent treatment" for a while after I stood up for Mary, who was getting bullied by Rosa and Co. You see, Rosa's one of those people who just has to have someone with her, all the time, regardless of whether or not they're friends with her. I mean, she considers them to be friends, for sure, but they probably don't. She controls and manipulates them, and, well, I used to be one of her little minions. But trust me, I backed out of that one pretty quick after I realized what was happening. And I didn't for a while. And perhaps that's the reason she treats me like dirt and then acts all innocently nice and pleasant when she thinks I'm not too angry with her. But trust me, I'm mad. So anyway, after I stood up for Mary, Rosa sort of stopped talking to me. Not like I cared, but still. I would have liked to turn things around and have HER in MY power, but it doesn't work like that. Not in this world. So she stopped talking to me, and then on Tuesday, she just comes up to me and asks all innocent-like "Are you going biking?" She sounded excited, like, "Oh we're friends again" but no, we're not. I told her, "yeah, but on the third day" and she was like "ohh" and I would have said "I'm glad I'm not going with YOU" but I didn't. I could have, because the counselor actually allowed me to say mean things to her. It's like "Whoa, there, I thought you guys were paid to respect children's feelings, not destroy them" but, oh well.